Anybody home?

HELLO everyone!!

I debated for a while on whether or not I should come back here at all (oh, who am I kidding….I really didn’t. Sorry. I just found myself bored tonight and wondering where I could possibly vent my thoughts in anonymity….and well, here I am!) 

I feel kind of guilty for abandoning this blog (not because I abandoned any “fans”….I’m sure any former readers have gotten along fine without me). What I felt guilty about is that this was yet another thing that I just gave up on. Kind of like my budget. Just….forgotten. I’m better than that, right?

To be honest, money has not been my focus AT ALL for the past year. I took a much lower paying job, and surprisingly enough I haven’t worried about money at all, and I haven’t been short or had to draw from my savings. Then again, I haven’t saved at all this year….

Oh, now for some updates!!!

1) I actually haven’t seen the ex since we broke up nearly a year ago (crazy, right?!! so proud of myself…..although I will not-so-proudly admit that I do look him on on Facebook now and then, and get a bit jealous at all the fun he looks like he’s having without me….)

2) I haven’t dated anyone either. Not on purpose. I’ve just been crazy busy with work, and it’s not like I get a lot of eligible bachelors come across my path on a regular basis. Well, I take that back….I guess I’m not trying hard enough. More about that some other time. 😉

3) I got Lasik eye surgery!! It is awesome, although I still need drops at least once a day. Still worth it. 

4) Work is killing me. But I love it. The guy that was my supervisor left last month with just a week’s notice and we were left scrambling…..and it also happened to leave me (kind of) in charge, and with his accounts. On the bright side I should start seeing the financial benefits somewhat soon. On the not-so-bright side I’ve been working a lot more hours….and I’m still salaried. The funny part is I really feel like I’m making a difference, so I work willingly. 

5) I got a new computer!! My laptop died a couple months ago, so I made a double switch…..to a desktop….and a Mac! I got a sexy new iMac!

Anyway, I can’t guarantee I’m back for good…..but it feels good to be back.

 

 

 

One debt down…

I haven’t exactly been good about my spending, but I still reached an important financial milestone this month….

I paid off my car!

As you all may remember, I’d been considering paying off my car loan ever since I landed my current job back in April.  I went back and forth on it (since either way my savings would take the hit), but when I moved into a lower-rent apartment I decided it was time. (You know how much I love starting things with a clean slate…)

The payoff was about $6,600 and now I have $229.50 less leaving my checking account every month. The best part is I paid my car off in two years instead of the scheduled 5! Hooray!

(And for the record, that leaves me with only one loan: a $27k Student Loan.)

 

Settling in

It only took me a week, but I finally have internet access again!

So what did I do while I was offline? Well, I moved (and let me tell you, it was exhausting), I cleaned, I organized (a little bit), and I shopped. And boy, have I shopped….

The good news is it’s already feeling like home. I feel really comfortable here, and other than a few things I have to get used to (like less space for my sewing stuff, and the presence of roaches….eww) I love it. I still have plenty of stuff to unpack, but I’m getting there. I also have a few more things to buy, but more about that next time…

Until then, have a good week!

 

 

 

Let the moving begin!

I met with my new landlady yesterday and she handed over the keys to my new apartment a couple days early! Needless to say, the move has also started a little earlier than expected.

Tonight I went over to the new place after work and did a bit of cleaning, then I drove back here, picked up a few things (mainly toilet paper, soap, and a lamp) and head back over. The move has officially begun! (Did I mention my two residences are only a few blocks away from each other?)

So, this will be the last time I blog from this apartment. We’ve had a good run. This place is charged with memories, both good and bad. While lately I find myself wanting to run from the bad ones, I know I’m going to miss this place….my first apartment.

(By the way, I failed to realize how quickly the move was creeping up and I have yet to look into the internet provider in the new building! Which means I’ll probably be offline for a few days starting on Saturday….I’ll be back though!)

 

August ’11 Goals

We’re already one week into the month, but if I don’t start now, I’m afraid I never will. So, it’s back to business!

August ’11 Goals

1 – Read Feng Shui Book

One thing I didn’t mention before? My boss is really into Feng Shui. Our entire office (and our individual offices) are arranged to have good Feng Shui…and since I tend to like that kinda stuff, I figured it wouldn’t hurt for me to incorporate some of those ideas into my new apartment! First step: read about it.

2 – Move into the new apartment and create a peaceful and harmonious living space. (i.e. Feng Shui my apartment…)

3 – Create a new budget and decide on a tracking system (and USE it!)

I’m embarrassed to admit how long it’s been since I’ve followed a budget. However, if you’re a longtime reader you can probably guess. (Hint: it’s been a while since I’ve posted my expenses…)

4 – Work out 3 times a week. (At least)

Again, embarrassed. Other than a dance class here and there it’s been ages since I’ve really worked up a sweat (and I’m afraid sweating while riding with the car windows down does not count). I’m thinking since the Turkey Trot 5k is coming up in a couple of months I should ease into exercise with some jogging.

5 – Create at least one thing.

I haven’t sewn in months. I tried sewing not too long after the breakup, but I was emotionally and creatively drained. I tried again after that….but my place was a mess. As soon as I get settled I’m pulling out the machine and starting up with an easy project! (Either something for the shop, or a simple top for me…)

I’m keeping it relatively simple this month, so let’s hope I succeed with all of them!

 

So, where were we?

Previously on Quarterlife Finances…

-I finally get a job after 1 year and 1 month of unemployment.

-Discover I really enjoy this job, even though initially I had my hesitations.

-Everything is going wonderfully….

-BF returns from a work trip to Europe, he continues with his quarterlife crisis antics, I play along.

-BF dumps me. I’m devastated. (On the bright side, I lose 5 pounds!)

 

Then I kinda disappeared….again…

Well, here’s what you’ve missed…

-I start my recovery from the breakup. It sucks. Really.

-I realize my lease will be up in a couple of months. I start to consider moving in with my parents again…

-I get depressed thinking about how I’ll have to sell all my furniture to move back into my parents house.

-I take out my emotional turmoil on my wallet. I go shopping.

-I get a new haircut, I get new shoes, some new clothes….I start to feel fabulous.

-I realize I’m too fabulous to live with my parents again. The search for a smaller, cheaper apartment begins.

-I turn 27 and have a fabulous party with my family and a few friends.

-My best friend from high school gets married. I attend solo, and surprisingly enough…I have an amazing time!

-I find an apartment I like! And just in time….I give my 30 day notice to my landlord.

-I jump through hoops to get approved to move into this association…3 letters of recommendation, a background check, a 200 question test, and a car inspection later I’m approved!

And so here we are. I move on the 13^th…that’s just next Saturday!! I’m really excited. I feel like I’m turning a corner and getting ready to begin a fresh new chapter in my life. (Hm, let’s see how many more clichés I can squeeze in here…) Of course, life doesn’t really change with me moving, but it feels like a big step in the right direction. Tune in again on Monday….when I reveal…..my goals for August!!!! (Somewhat anti-climactic, I’m sure…) Have a good weekend!

 

One month later…

Guys, it’s been a month. And guess what?

…I’ve survived!

I hate to be all “positive” and stuff (after all, I do love to make myself the victim), but I honestly feel pretty great right now. I mean, I still get a little sting every now and then when I think about my ex-boyfriend, but 90% of the time I’m pretty good.

Without going into too many details I’ll just say it really, really sucked for a while. I’m glad to report though that I haven’t seen him since the night he broke up with me! I thought you all were crazy when you said it’d be easier to heal if I didn’t see or talk to him at all, but apparently you all know what you’re talking about.

I realize I’m not completely “over him” and I’m likely to experience some more setbacks in the future, but hey, this is a fantastic start. I’m feeling pretty good about myself at the moment, and I plan to enjoy it. I’m at the lowest I’ve weighed in YEARS (breaking up is by far the easiest/most effective diet I’ve ever done!). I’m starting to feel like myself again…I knew I’d turned a corner the day I thought to myself “I’m in the mood for push-ups.” Needless to say, I’ve started to work out and take dance classes once again. I didn’t want to look at my sewing machine for weeks, but now I’m making plans for my summer wardrobe and new projects. Best of all, I’ve realized (and embraced the fact that) I can flirt now! I’d forgotten how much fun flirting was! lol (Not that I’m ready to date or anything….that’s a whole other topic you can look forward to reading about in the future….)

Anyway, I went a bit longer with this than intended, but I just wanted to check in to let you all know….I’m ok. You guys have been awesome with your kind and wise words. I’ve read and re-read your comments, and I’m so thankful. =]

 

Moping, continued…

Disclaimer: This post started off as a comment to the last post, but morphed into it’s own thing as I sat on my couch feeling sorry for myself. The majority of parenthetical statements were made as I re-read the post to make sure I wasn’t rambling. Which explains why the tone might jump around a bit. If I was a serious blogger I probably wouldn’t post this, but what the heck….

Thank you all for the encouraging comments. You guys are so sweet. Without any real-life friends I can be completely honest with (or am scared of being completely honest with), you guys are the next best thing.

This is the first time I have really ever gotten my heart broken…much less after such a long relationship. I’m sure this is normal, and I KNOW I’m not the first or the only one to feel this way, but it’s proving to be incredibly hard.

I’m fine one minute, and think I have it all figured out and I’m ready to live my life. Next thing you know, I sit on the couch, something runs across my mind, and I realize that the life I thought I had in front of me has drastically changed. And the uncontrollable sobbing begins again. I’m tempted to fill up my schedule so that I don’t have TIME to think about how I feel, but I’m pretty sure I’d just end up breaking down eventually. (And worse, in public or at work.) Part of me is glad that I have a three day weekend to digest this so that I can function at work on Tuesday, but all this free time….I don’t want to fill it up with sobbing, curled up on the couch. (My eyes can’t take that.)

I wonder how long I’ll feel this way. And sadly, the foremost recurring thought is: who is going to be the first to change their facebook status? And after that, how long will it be before he starts sleeping with other girls? He was my first love….not to mention the only guy I’ve ever been with. I can’t imagine him with someone else. I DON’T WANT TO. (Fact: I was also his first serious relationship….which I’m sure is what partially led him to conclude that he wants to experience life on his own since we started dating so young. Which I’m not sure if that basically translates to “sleep around a bit.” Or maybe that’s just me being cynical and over-dramatic? In that case, his “in a relationship” status kind of calms me….since the majority of potential sleeping partners would eventually be checking that. Yes….I’m a pathetic and silly girl.)

He wants me to “stay in his life”…what does that mean, and will I be able to handle that without repeatedly wondering/hoping if he will take me back? Should I even want him to take me back? (Again with the honesty, part of me is desperately hoping he won’t make it past one week and will realize that I’m enough to make him happy.)

He called me yesterday to check on how I was doing. (I guess to make sure I’m not suicidal? He saw what a mess I’d become when I was unemployed….) He sounded pretty miserable, and I felt bad about that because I had made an effort to sound really cheery when I answered the phone….but I can’t help but be mad at him. It hurt so much when he said that he felt he was doing the right thing. Afterall, that makes me the WRONG thing. And yet I was encouraging that last night….trying to convince myself that he was right.

Yeah….I’m a bit of a mess right now, even though I want to deny it to myself. My cousins daughter’s birthday party is this afternoon and I can’t figure out what I should do…go and face my life (including having to answer to everyone asking “where’s [the BF], is he coming today?”, or stay in and cry ’til my eyes hurt. I did the whole “on the verge of tears” yesterday, but apparently that didn’t help because I bawled my eyes out just now.

I guess it’s a process that I can’t rush. (But oh, how I want to rush it….get it over with…)

I’ll try not to turn this blog into a mopey mess, but I’m not always good at that, and when it comes down to it this blog has always been more of a journal for me than a how-to guide when it comes to finances. I hope you understand that, and I appreciate you sticking around.

 

Single again.

My boyfriend broke up with me last night.

I’m not sure it’s completely set in quite yet, it doesn’t feel like it’s really happening. And yet I woke up this morning crying, and couldn’t go back to sleep. It was his idea, and while I can’t say it came out of nowhere, it did take me by surprise. I knew he was going through a personal/identity crisis, but I didn’t really think this is the direction he’d take it….

I can’t say I blame him. He doesn’t want to turn into his parents (bitter and resentful of each other), and I definitely don’t want him to be unhappy. I could be selfish, but would that really help me?

I’m not sure where to go from here. It hasn’t even been 12 hours, but I just want to skip over this suffering part. I just want to get out of my apartment and move on and pretend the last 8 years never happened.

The saddest part is I don’t have any real friends I can call to talk to. Which is why part of me kind of understands why this needs to happen….I need to learn to exist outside of our relationship. He says he doesn’t want me out of his life….and really, we know each other better than anyone else does so it’d be hard to break it off and never see each other again. But I’m afraid that in the back of my mind I’ll always be sitting around waiting, hoping that he’ll change his mind.

So I’m not sure what’s next. I guess I move on?

 

 

I’m getting Lasered!

I mentioned in my last goals post that I had to schedule a laser follow up appointment….which made me realize I haven’t told you about it yet!!

So, let’s back up…I’ll make this quick, and try not to share TMI.

Basically, I hate shaving. I’ve come to terms with shaving my legs (I find that if I alternate shaving with using my “Silk-Epil” machine it’s a lot less irritating), however over the years shaving my underarms has become more and more painful. Not just that, but even if I’ve just shaved I still look like I have a shadow under my arms. It’s annoying.

My sister has been raving about laser hair removal for years now, and I even went in for a consultation a few years back.  I had them quote a bunch of different areas, and basically I could get my underarms for about $700, bikini for around $1300, and face for another $1200. Each 6 treatments or so, with a “lifetime warranty”. I was considering it pretty seriously, but in the end my mom told me to shop around some more.

Anyway, to get to the point….a few months ago my sister alerted me to the fact that laser companies were starting to offer up treatments on groupon. Usually 3-6 treatments for $50-100. So I started to keep an eye out. When I finally saw 6 treatments go for $100 I jumped on it!! I was going to get my underarms lasered!

A few weeks after that, Living Social posted another one…..this time, bikini line was an option….so I jumped on it too!

So that’s the story. I had my first underarm treatment a couple of weeks ago, and I’m due for the next one in 4-5 weeks (which is what I need to schedule). The first bikini treatment is this weekend! I know it’s a completely unnecessary expense, but it’s something I’ve really wanted to do, and I was willing to pull from my savings to finance it. Let’s hope it works!

(Moral of the story: listen to your mom. If I’d paid all that money for laser treatments back then I’d be so mad now!)